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I’m feeling better, getting back to where I was. But am I the same if nobody recognizes me?

So I am getting help. I need to overcome this. Today didn’t help. It hurts, my mind makes it worse.

“If you ask me how I’m doing, I’ll tell you I’m doing just fine. I’ll tell you that you’re not on my mind. Then go out, and sit at a table set for two, then I realize I face the truth, that I’m not over you.”
“I used to feel warm with you, in your arms, like this whiskey feels down my throat as I try and forget you.”

She is in the living room, napping. I believe I have confirmed my own fear that I am not over her. What do you say? What do you do? Deep down I pray for the best, but when the best doesn’t involve us together, what am I really praying for?

When one is reminded of memories of happy times, isn’t it supposed to make you happy? Lately, it seems I die a little each time I am reminded of a happy memory knowing how happy I was then and that there is a possibility that I may not ever be that happy again…

This time, it’s different. We’ve fought over stupid things and have gone back to where we were before. After those fights, we were good. This time it’s different. I’m not back there. You started something I had nothing to do with. I’m tired. I’ve done so much for you, sacrificed a lot. This time it’s different. It’s your call and I’m gonna be ok with it. No more fighting. I’m tired. I’m done. This time, it’s different.